Wednesday 24 April 2013

So How Do You Ask Someone Out On A Date?


Asking someone out on a date is always daunting, and unless there is a clear spark there, is very rarely easy. But there are a couple of simple things to remember which should make it a little easier.

1. Prepare yourself for rejection: No one likes to be told no, but it's a fact of life and something we have to take in our stride and accept we aren't going to get what we want. This is no more relevant than when asking someone out on a date. By preparing yourself for the worst, you are already getting over the biggest hurdle and in return, getting over your worries which bring on a lack of confidence and affect performance.

2. Avoid straight forward questions: Unless you're 100% sure the answer is going to be 'Yes' avoid asking outright "will you go out with me" as this often leads to a short and simple "No!", knocking your confidence and leaving you with nothing else to come back with. Try making it less formal whilst leaving options. "Hey, I'd really like to get together sometime and do something with you". Not only does this open a conversation of the what's, where's and when's, but it also reduces the possibilities for the other party to simply knock you back.

3. Know when to give up: It should be pretty clear from the outset as to whether the other party is interested in a date or not. If after following the steps above, and you've suggested a couple of dates and you're still getting short, one-word answers of "Not Free", "I'm busy that day" and "sorry, I can't make it", it's now time to cut your losses and give up as each rejection is just going to knock your confidence more and more, making it even harder for the next time, as well as making you look more and more desperate. Know when to give up and move on, and don't take it too personally! After all, it just means that you haven't found the right one yet.

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